My Nana gets some of her bits and bobs, as she calls them, from a shop just around the corner from her house.
The man who works in the shop is quite old and I think my Nana has known him for years and years.
Anyway, when they stand at the counter talking for ages I just watch him because he’s the strangest looking old man ever, he looks like his face is melting. Nana calls him Mr Jellyface because he’s got a name that’s hard to say and sounds a bit like Jellyface. I think it’s a great name because his face does look a lot like a bowl of squishy jelly, a tall jelly that has been out too long and is starting to melt down at the sides.
Mr Jellyface smells quite bad, not as bad as Nana’s feet, but very eggy. It’s because he trumps a lot. When Nana’s talking to him, he just stands there letting off the whole time!
Loud raspy ones, quiet watery ones and sometimes ones that squeak like a balloon going down slowly!

one time he did a great big one while he stood next to the gas fire in his shop and he set his trousers on fire because his trump caught fire on the flame and blew up

Michael Molloy

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